This week I have
spent a long time reflecting on who I am and where I stand in the gospel. I
love reading through Nephi’s psalm and catching a glimpse of his soul. He truly
is a hero, in every sense of the word. I thought I would try to write down the
thoughts I had as my own personal psalm. It is certainly not a classic but it
reveals my soul. It is not numbered and the language is modern, but here goes:
O Lord, my Saviour and my Redeemer!
My heart is as heavy as a weighted
anchor. The deep waters cradle my drowning heart.
How could your purity and sanctity be defiled
by my paltry sins? How could I add to your pain with my weakness; add to your
heartache with my failings?
My children flounder in humanity because
I have failed to guide them, to prepare them, to provide the strength of the gospel
shield. How can this be forgiven?
Yet, my sins are known to thee, and I am
loved. I am a child of God; I am special; I have eternal potential.
I must lift my anchor, shake off the
salty water, and allow my boat to move forward towards the far shore. I must
shake off the chains of depression that provide a fertile home for lack of
motivation, procrastination, feeling insignificant, and unworthy.
There is a glimmer of light in the
darkness. As my anchor approaches the surface of the water, I see the glow of
the sun and the light warms and encompasses me. My heart is overwhelmed with
gratitude; my heart is filled with joy in recognition of my bounteous
blessings.
I am filled with gratitude for the
sunshine, clear, cloudless skies, the love of animals, the love of my children
and their children, my parents, my life.
The previously still water ripples with
a gentle breath of air. My heart sings its own song of joy as I watch my
granddaughter sleep. The sweet smell of newly opened jasmine on the fence and
grapefruit flowers in full bloom, sipping that first sip of chilled water on a
hot day after a fast, the first day after the coughing has finally stopped and
I know I am back to full health, a hug from anyone at any time – all these heighten
my awareness of everyday blessings.
I acknowledge the greatest blessing from
my elder brother, my Redeemer, my Lord – His Atonement. The hope instead of
guilt; the ability to be clean, to be forgiven; to once more see His face and
walk in His presence, knowing He loves me – this is the key to shaking off the
doubts and facing the challenges.
The gratitude must be accompanied by
right choices: choosing the scriptures instead of the new novel; choosing church
attendance instead of sleeping in on a cold morning or napping on a drowsy
afternoon; choosing honesty at all costs; choosing prayer; choosing temple
attendance; choosing eternity.
Lord, grant me the strength to shake off
the doubts and forge ahead; to appreciate my great blessings; to gain strength
from thy love; to seek thee in humility; to make the right choices. I will love
and praise thee, forever.
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| I made this picture for my Facebook page. These are some of my choicest blessings: my mum , ex-, children & grandchildren. Love them dearly. Photo taken on my mum's 90th birthday! |
I discussed psalms
with my dear mum and she mentioned a psalm she had written many years ago. It
was the first time I had read it. I found it moving and inspirational, so I
asked her if I could share it. Her psalm is numbered and very similar in style
to the Old Testament psalms. Here is her psalm:
Psalm
of Praise by Ina Esther Hearns
1. Oh mighty organizer of worlds and suns without number, thou who has
brought order to the infinite universe
2. Through whom the righteous will savour the glories of exaltation and
by whom the corrupt will receive perfect judgement.
3. Thy eternal power will stem the red tidal wave of evil, thou wilt
crush the hordes of the anti-Christ beneath thy heel.
4. In these latter-days the spires of thy Holy Houses will reach towards
the heavens, a beacon of hope to thy people.
5. That here thy Saints may serve thee in gratitude, for thy tender
mercies they will encompass themselves in holiness.
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| Our beautiful Hamilton temple - photo from |
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